As predicted in 1981...
I am so tired of these two words I see everywhere now. Meh and meme.
Today's agenda: I have a doctor's appointment at 2pm in Oakland, so I should get home about 3:30 or so. The Roddick/Federer match that was on live at 12:30am this morning is being replayed at 3pm on ESPN2, so I should be able to catch most of the match. The challenge is getting through the next 7 hours without finding out who won. Please don't be an asshole and tell me.
I also need to buy soap. I discovered tuesday morning that we were completely out of soap. And shampoo. So tuesday I just showered in hot water. Then Tuesday night, of course, I forgot to buy soap on my shopping trip to Safeway, so yesterday morning I showere with Dawn. Dawn, the dishwashing liquid. The anti-bacterial formula. And then yesterday I was going to stop at Walgreen's on my home and buy soap. Forgot again. So not only did I have to shower using Dawn again this morning, I had to listen to Tony complain last night about how we "never have soap." This despite the fact that there is a Walgreen's right next to the capoeira studio where he spends most of his time.
Why is everything my job? I'd put him in charge of soap procurement, but then we'd really never have soap in the house.
I try to limit myself to one exclamation point per email. This chick from our San Diego office needs to work on that.
I talked to Brad in the SF office. He said not a problem at all! He can get you guys all space to work from the office up there. He gets there about 7:30am, he said just to ring the bell until he hears it! You can email him as soon as you know, so he can have a heads up! I told him you wouldn’t know for sure until later this evening!
A homeless guy just told me I look like Alec Baldwin. Then he asked me to buy him a bag of chips.
I was all for the new Animal Planet show "Underdog to Wonderdog," but everything about it just seems off. First and most annoying problem: why do they need to bring a "canine carpenter" in as part of the team? He ends up building a stupid doghouse everytime that you know is never going to be used by the freaking dog. Can we focus on the dog please, and not some stupid carpenter who can't get a show on HGTV, so they crammed him into this show? And there is something off about the whole team. The black guy who leads the team bugs the shit out of me. He just seems fake. And why do they always choose these litlle purebred dogs? The two shows I've seen featured a yorkshire terrier and a chocolate cocker spaniel. Once they were cleaned up and given their faggety "grooming" jobs, they just end up looking like expensive faggety dogs. And if these dogs are so troubled, and have had such horrible lives, how the hell do they get them turned around and ready to live with a family in just two weeks? Yes, it's pretty amazing to see them clean up these dogs and give them homes. But to me it seems like, lets find a matted, dirty dog that is basically pretty sweet and just has some matted fur and a sad story, give it a fancy groom job, bring some fag in to build a dog house and call it a day. Where are the Ritas and Argos (and Magnolias and Frannies) of the world? A real mutt with real issues that needs more than two weeks and groom job. That would be a real underdog to wonderdog. Sorry show, I am unfortunately not a fan. And this show was supposed to be so up my alley.
So I am outside the office on here on 3rd street feeding the meter for one of our clients and i see this crazy woman walking down the sidewalk in my direction. She gets to where I am and stops to ask a question. She has on a hello kitty beanie, is carrying a hello kitty handbag, has on a tight, black and white striped top that has cleavage down to about her belly button. Her face is abnormally white, like she has powdered it, and she is wearing blood red lipstick that is slathered on like crazy. Tight jeans and a little pink hoodie. And then I notice her piercings. She has a studs spaced about every three inches down the center of her chest, starting just below her clavicle and going all the way down to he belly button (and maybe further). Never seen that one before. So here is the conversation:
Hello Kitty: Hey man, do you know where the courthouse is?
Me: The Courthouse? What courthouse?
HK: The courthouse, man!
Me: Well, the hall of justice is over on 7th and Bryant. And the state courthouse is by city hall.
HK: No, the regular courthouse. I've been there before. It's on Fourth and Brannan or Fourth and Bryant.
Me: Well, you're on Third. Fourth is the next street over.
HK: I know that man. So you don't know where the courthouse is?
Me: I guess not.
HK: Fuck, man. Fuck.
And with that she turned and continued making her way down third street.
She was so good the first couple weeks. I was so proud of Rita, sleeping through the whole night on her dog bed next to Tito. I was thinking I might even be able to put the folding metal dog gate back away, since she was so good at staying on her bed and being quiet all night. Well, of course that was too good to last. The new thing is waking up at 3 or 4 in the morning and pushing on the metal gate until there is enough room for her to get out. Then she heads for the TV room and goes back to sleep on the couch. This is not allowed because the TV room and the couch in the TV room are where Diabla now lives most of her life. Also, the dogs need to sleep on their dog beds. So I get Rita off the couch and put her back on her bed behind the gate. The first couple nights this worked fine (this started on Thursday night). One trip back to the dog bed, put the metal gate back in place, and she stays put the rest of the night. Now she has figured out something new - push on the gate just enough to squeeze by (and make enough noise to wake me up), and wait by the kitchen door for me to put her back behind the gate. Of course, this means she gets to see me, and of course I give her a big hug and tell her she can't wake me up at 4am every night like this. OK, I know I shouldn't be hugging her when she does this, and I have stopped,but I think even the attention of me telling her no and grabbing her by the collar to put her back on her bed is enough attention to make her happy. So now she does this repeatedly throughout the night. Saturday it was every couple hours (1am, 3am, 5am). Last night it was 12am, 1am, 1:30am, 2:00am, you get the picture. So my choice now is, I realize when she does it, she needs something she does not like to happen. So I can either put her outside, or put her in her crate. Both of which I hate doing, but I have to do one of them. Last night at 3am, I decided I would have to put her in her crate. But her crate is on the back porch, and when I opened the kitchen door, she ran outside and under the porch. She was upset because Tony had yelled at her the third time she woke us up pushing the gate open. She freaks out easily, please don't yell at her Tony. So 3am and I am outside in the amazingly bright moonlight trying to coax her out from under the porch. I finally gave up and went back to bed. I woke up at 4am worried about her, and when I opened the kitchen door, luckily she ran right up the steps and into the house. But I had to put her in her crate for the rest of the night.
So my dilemma is this: when Rita pushes the metal gate aside, waking us up, should i put her in her crate, or put her outside on the back porch? And if I do that every time, without giving her any affection, will she learn not to push on the gate anymore? I can't be up three or four times every night from 1am to 4am.
Hello Rita, my new sweetie pie. She has her issues, but she is lovable and loyal as can be.
i don't know why i can't make these bigger.
